We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
