oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Randomize