He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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