; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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