He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
