So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
