I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize
