would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
