Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
