there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
