: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
