If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
