he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
