eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Randomize
