pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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