How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
