ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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