Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
