I'm eating all of the evidence.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
