he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
