Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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