I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
