um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
We talked him into tasing himself.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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