Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
