Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
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