apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
