I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize