I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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