I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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