u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
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