he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
