Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
