i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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