And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
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