well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
