Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
