____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
