He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
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