Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
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