remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
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