Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
