We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
