He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
