Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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