i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
