East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
