I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize