Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize