Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize