so that wasnt chicken after all
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
